Pain, Suffering and the CCM...

I'm back! I had a rotten year and now trying to get back into a rhythm, but on to this blog topic!

Lately i've been on a 90's emo rock nostalgia trip. Ahhh the agony and the irony of this life! One song that has struck me time and again is "Its been while" by Staind. As i was reflecting on this, (yes im that kind of geek) i realized that sometime in the late 90's i stopped listening to Christian music. Yeah i had my DC Talk and Audio Adrenaline CD's, but once they stopped playing, i kinda lost interest in Christian Music, after all one can only take so much of Twila Paris!

Upon further reflection i realized that it has much to do with my own maturing faith. I found myself thinking more and more about the theology that was being espoused in much of the music. In addition there seemed to be some skittishness around pain and suffering. (lets be clear, naval gazing without action is not what i'm espousing!) I find this skittishness to be uniquely American, but not biblical! The bible states that we have crosses to bear and following JC is not going to be easy!

In addition as a GenXer i found myself being more and more turned off by what seemed like poser entrances into the music scene. Christian hard rock bands, trying to be hard in sound but not in lyrics. The pain that drives rock music was not there. In the end i walked away. Or rather i started listening more to worship compilations and ignoring the rest of the christian music business. And yet i still feel a twinge of guilt in my evangelical soul...

I guess what i'm looking for and find in secular music, but not so much in Christian music is an honesty about the struggles. An honesty that some of us are not made to be white, middle class and perfect. I have a buddy who struggles with mental illness and is a christian, but whenever he goes to church or hangs out with his christian friends, he feels totally alienated. Where's the music that speaks into that experience?

Eh... i give up, back to reminiscing about my emo days...